How hard is dating Russian ladies for Europeans?

Image of a talking couple

Even before you meet even one Russian face-to-face in your life, you know that it won’t be very easy instinctively. Russian culture seems different even on the surface. And when you get to know their way of life better, dating Russian ladies will seem even more of a challenge.

Table of content:

  1. Are Russians really that different?
  2. The general behavior
  3. Do Slavs get along with the Russians better?
  4. The difference in values
  5. General difficulties
  6. Geography
  7. Schengen zone
  8. Language
  9. In conclusion

Experience a lengthy interaction with any Slav for people most commonly associated with Europe (British, French or German) is hard already. Russia, on the other hand, feels alien to Europe, you might notice it just by looking at the map. Its population is pretty different from your average European as well, hence the mutual lack of understanding.

Are Russians really that different?

It’s impossible to describe every Russian in existence in this article and compare them afterward, obviously. Hence, this paragraph is about an average Russian person in their early 20s.

In short, don’t freak out if you meet someone who behaves differently. 

The general behavior

Russians are quite different from Europeans in a few small aspects, mentality-wise. Understanding some of them will make your relationship drastically smoother. Here are some of them:

The very first thing you notice in a Russian person is that they rarely smile even to people they know. You can either attribute it to the relative depressiveness in the country (it’s actually too strong of a word, ‘melancholy’ suits better) or to the unique philosophy regarding emotions.

The emotions aren’t for you to enjoy. Unlike many hyperemotional Europeans, Russians are pretty reserved in that regard. People don’t generally display a lot of emotion in public, it’s reserved for the dear ones.

There’s even prejudice against the people who laugh or smile too much, they are subconsciously considered insincere and slimy. That’s probably where the stereotype about the cold and calm Russians came to be.

You can also notice that Russians tend not to interact with other people if they can help it. You can spend an entire day cruising through the city and not hear a single word. They will talk to you if you start a conversation. This conversation may very well be the lengthiest in your entire life. It’s just that people in Russia really respect your personal right to do whatever you want.

Unless you do something that makes their routine harder, that is. In this case, you may expect to get a very powerful reaction, maybe even hear a couple of curse words.

Generally, Russians are pretty reserved and may even seem indifferent until you get to know them better. When they are at home, they allow themselves to be emotional and behave as it pleases them (literally).
Picture of an unsmooth relationship

Do Slavs get along with the Russians better?

That’s a very good question, as there isn’t a group closer to Russians than the Slavic countries of Europe (including Poland, Czech Republic, Serbia, Bulgaria, and many others).

And the answer isn’t very encouraging — the Slavic family is pretty large, and Russians don’t have good relations with many of them. But say your girlfriend and you don’t have any prejudice towards any ethnic group, will you get along smoothly in that case?

Well, in this case, the differences in mentality come into play. It would be easy to say that all Eastern Europeans are the same, but it’s just inattentive and not considerate. These people may drink and curse a lot all the same, but the more to the West you look, the more Western values you get.

The difference in values

Now that the subject has been approached, it’s time to explain the difference of values between the Western and Eastern Europeans. It may sound like a cliche nowadays because people say it all the time not really knowing what this ‘difference’ implies.

It’s simple — the Eastern parts of Europe are poorer and less developed. Hence, they like to rely on communities rather than individual people. That’s why people in Russia seem very caring to even strangers.

You can see it clearly in how families work. In many Western countries, children usually leave the family nest when they turn 18 to build something on their own. It is a good taste that once you’re ready for college, you should be as independent of your parents as possible.

This, however, doesn’t work in Russia, for instance. People try to start earning money as early as possible but nobody expects you to leave the place when you turn 18.

None of it may cause conflict, but such small differences en masse are exactly what makes the relationships harder. And, as you can see, there are lots of small differences, starting with mental friction and ending with different values.

General difficulties

Temper differences are all fine, but a European will be met with more general obstacles while dating Russian ladies. These don’t fully depend on you, but rather the situation around.

Geography

Russia is located in the Eastern-most edges of Europe. Depending on where you live, going there may be either pain in the back or a pretty smooth trip. And the funniest part is, you can’t deduce the comfort with which you will be traveling by estimating the distance between you and the destination.

Because one airplane can take you to Russia in one go, and the other one will have to drop you off somewhere and then repeat. That’s why you need to research this stuff long before trying to go to Russia.

And you will want to visit your girlfriend once in a while. Sure, dating Russian ladies purely online is fine, but for long and healthy emotional exchange you need to see her sometimes.

True, you may arrange so that she goes to your country and not vice versa if all the problems are on your side. But there are difficulties with that as well.

Schengen zone

In short, it’s much easier for you to travel to Russia than otherwise. Russia doesn’t demand a special visa to enter. All you need is a standard visa that you can get without very much pain.

Most of Europe, on the other hand, has submitted to the Schengen zone. It means that, apart from the usual visa, people outside of the zone need to acquire a special one. And… it is a pain in the back.

And even if she has a visa, she may not even be able to travel to you in comfort. Most of the Russian people live in the European part of the country, but the Asian part is 3 times larger. And people live there two.
Image of a troubled relationship

Language

Oh, that’s a famous one. If you feel that dating Russian ladies is something you want for yourself in the future, mind the language.

Russians generally don’t speak the English language apart from several locations, like:

  1. Moscow and the Moscow Oblast;
  2. Saint Petersburg;
  3. Kazan — the capital of the Tatarstan Republic;
  4. Sochi — the resort on the Black sea coast;
  5. Vladivostok

And most of the people who speak the language there only know the basics. That’s why you’re advised to start dating Russian ladies on the Internet because there’s a higher chance that you’ll get an adequate response in English, especially in the dating websites.

Russians don’t know any other languages apart from their mother tongue and some English as well if you wondered. Shame, because German was generally the one foreign language people knew well a long time ago.

In the end, if you don’t want to learn Russian, the chance that you’ll be able to communicate with your girlfriend is pure gamble.

In conclusion

Dating Russian ladies may be hard for a European. Not only because of differences in mentality, but also general problems like distances, high cost of travel, language lacking and a lot more. Hopefully, all these problems didn’t dissuade from pursuing your relationship.

If it did, maybe you can persuaded back by one of these articles, try them if you want. And if you don’t want to read, you can check out the video below, it’s quite helpful too:

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